Category Archives: Supernatural

Supernatural Recap – 8×23 “Sacrifice”

Sam and Dean

Jeremy Carver is clearly an evil genius.  He has written one of the best episodes of Supernatural, and then left us hanging at the end of, arguably, the show’s strongest season. Just look at the montage from the season as ‘Carry On My Wayward Son’ plays.  From ‘Hunteri Heroci’, ‘LARP & the Real Girl’ and ‘Goodbye Stranger’, and so many others, this Season has propelled forward the myth arc of the Winchesters, given them a home, killed off the ultimate frenemy (Meg), introduced a new arch enemy (Abaddon) & given the boys a new sister (Charlie!).

So, to end this all, Carver decided to hurt us, in so many ways…

Carrying on from last week, we’re revisiting old friends. And here is Sheriff Jody Mills. She looks great! Really lovely, out on a blind date, with Roderick…who’s really Crowley. And he’s laying on the charm thick and fast. So, as she goes out to powder her nose, all smiley and slightly tipsy, he starts chanting. She applies her lipstick, and finds the hex bag, just in time to start coughing up blood. NO, not Jody! She’s been through enough! And then Crowley gets interrupted by the phone, ah, Sir Mix a Lot!

So, as Jody collapses on the floor, Dean agrees to meet to swap tablets. Only thing is, we don’t know if he actually ever says “I Surrender”, like Crowley wants him to. So, does Jody survive or not?  Aaarrggh, we don’t know!

Following on the deal being struck, Kevin goes and digs up the other half of the demon tablet from underneath a devil chili sign.  Makes sense to me.  You wouldn’t forget where it is, would you? Dean gives him the key to the MOL bunker so he can stay there until all is resolved.  So, it seems like it could all be finally over for Kevin.  Yeah, right…

Houston, Texas: Cas & Marv are hanging out at a bus stop.  They’re keeping an eye on a bar owner, Dwight, while discussing what God was really like.  Apparently, among other things, slightly sexist, but ultimately fair. Dwight is due to be visited by Cupid in the next 24 hours, so they’re hanging out to see Cupid and retrieve its’ bow as the second Trial on the Angel Tablet. Cas isn’t the most patient at this point, so he decides to try and move things along.  He explains to Marv that he has knowledge of this due to his work with humans. Great! So, having checked the personal ads he asks Dwight whether he’s “…looking for a partner in crime, or someone who’s into nurse role-play & light domination.” His subtlety is wonderful, huh? Naomi has been tipped off that Cas & MetaMarv are at the bar, and arrives with her heavies to collect them. Well, the initial plan seems to be to seize Metatron, and kill Cas, but Dwight shoots at one of the henchmen, and distracts her.  So, Metatron is taken to heaven, and Cas is left alone.

Sioux Falls, South Dakota: In the meantime, Sam & Dean have arrived at their meeting point with Crowley. It’s Singer’s Salvage Yard. *Sniff* They stop for a moment and look at Bobby’s car, rusting away *Whimper*. And then, there’s Crowley. I know he’s evil, I know he’s been the thorn in the boys’ side for a long time, but I love Crowley! He’s like Dean’s dark side. They share a similar sense of humor, and are a great double act. So, they agree to exchange the tablets (I’ll show you mine if you show me yours), followed by the ridiculously long contract, which has to be signed by Sam as he’s the one going through the trials.

Dean acts as attorney, and insists on reading the fine print, whilst moving his lips. Eventually, he agrees that he’s satisfied enough for Sam to sign, and as they nod in agreement to each other, they slap the demon warded handcuffs on Crowley. Oh, Dean relishes in informing him that he is now their bitch. And yes, as it had to be, Crowley is the Third Trial, the demon to be cured. Quite frankly, anyone else would have been an insult.

Church (Sam, Dean & Crowley): They bring Crowley to a church to start the cure.  He is trussed up in the chains and in a Devil’s Trap, and Sam is retrieving gear from the car. Seemingly, he still needs to go through confession, sans priest, to purify his blood for the cure. Really? I thought everything he’d already done would have been enough. But, anyway…. So, Sam’s feeling pretty confident, like they actually have a chance of winning for once, and just needs to figure out what to confess before he starts the cure. And luckily, he’s got his supportive big brother on hand to help him. Well, you can confess about Ruby, Lilith, releasing Lucifer from his cage, not looking for me in Purgatory….Nice, Dean. Take him down a peg or ten just when he’s starting to feel good about himself.

Cas arrives looking for help. He explains to Dean that Naomi has seized Metatron while they were trying to complete the Second Trial on the Angel Tablet.  What??!! Dean smells a rat. The guy who was hiding out for centuries suddenly wants to become the savior of Heaven? He wants to stay and chaperone Sam, but Sam tells him to go. That way they could be rid of all the Angels & Demons. So, Dean agrees to leave, and promises to be back in 8 hours, but orders Sam to continue even if he’s not. Cue hug….cue hug…..where’s the freaking hug? This has been the Hug Season! No hugging = bad.

With Dean and Cas gone, Sam gets to work on the cure. Not surprisingly, the initial results are less than impressive, with Sam’s arms glowing white, and Crowley calling him Moose. An hour later, when he administers the second dose, Crowley bites him, really hard. I’m laughing at Sam’s reaction, “Biting, really?”, as though he’s speaking to a child who should know better. He is a demon, Sam. He’s bound to do something! Sam runs out to bandage his arm, and Crowley spits Sam’s blood into his hand, using it to perform an S.O.S spell.

Heaven: Naomi is working her magic on Metatron.  Although they haven’t met before, he’s aware of who she is.  She was due to ‘debrief’ him for the Archangels after God left, but he ran away before she could.  So, she wants to know why he’s back, too.  Obviously, they were always going to look for him, and find him.  Best way to find out what’s going on in an angels’ mind is clearly through his eye with a drill. Eeeeewwww… Have fun, Marv!

Dean & Cas: First stop for Dean & Cas is to the MOL bunker to give Kevin the Angel Tablet.  So, you have 6 hours to translate it – go!  Kevin is sulking. This is meant to be over for him.  As he pours himself a whisky and tries to look big, Cas not so gently reminds him that he is a Prophet of the Lord until he ceases to exist, and that is that.  No more Tiger Mommy, so Tiger Angel instead.

Dean & Cas go to the bar to keep an eye on Dwight and wait for Cupid. Cas is still trying to find Dwight a woman, but can’t seem to find a real one.  Dean’s drinking on the job is worrying Cas, ha! Finally, in a scene that Dean finds scarily familiar, Gail, the attractive delivery lady, arrives. She’s filling in for Frank, who’s off sick with flu.  There’s smiles all round between Gail, Dwight & Rod, who’s at the bar most days.  She thanks them with a hand on each of their shoulders.and leaves? As the guys suddenly notice each other during a crossbow commercial on TV, Dean is once again, surprised.

He just has no gaydar at all, does he? They follow Gail outside to ask for her bow.  Well, Dean wants to ask, Cas has his angel blade at the ready. No, Cas, talk first, stab later. Words to live by! Cupid has had enough of the chaos in Heaven too.  She has been avoiding going home because of it, and is willing to give Cas her bow if he can sort things out.  Her bow appears as a mark in her hand which he has to carve out. Now, I for one, have been waiting for the happy, chubby man who appeared in ‘My Bloody Valentine’ to appear. You know, the guy in the nappy that kept hugging everyone? I liked him. Oh well, guess not all the Cupids are cherubs after all.

Heaven: Naomi has been digging inside MetaMarv’s brain. She’s asking him why he’s doing what he’s doing.  Which is…? No, not yet. Hmm…

Church (Sam & Crowley): They are over 5 hours in to the curing process, and Sam is looking like shit.  No other way of putting it.  Crowley is still Crowley, singing Bowie and calling Sam every version of moose he can think of.  Suddenly, the earth shakes and the floor cracks, breaking the Devil’s Trap. In walks Abaddon.  I’ve been wondering where she went.  “Hello boys,” she says. Hey Crowley, she’s stealing your lines!

She’s a little bit miffed and wants a word with Crowley, alone apparently. So she throws Sam out the window.  Time travelling through a closet and having her head chopped off were annoying, but what’s really got her goat is that Crowley is now the King of Hell. Not quite the rescue party he was hoping for as she punches and kicks him.  I should point out that she was handpicked by Lucifer to be one of his Knights, so she sees Crowley as very much beneath her.  Abaddon has decided it’s time for a regime change, for a Queen of Hell, perhaps?  Sam interrupts by dousing her with holy oil and setting her alight. That’s it, her meat suit is gone, and she smokes out immediately.

Sam rights Crowley back in his chair, fixes the Devil’s Trap. Crowley can’t believe it! They’ve just done battle together, he’s proud of Sam. Doesn’t he feel it? Sam administers the 6th dose.  Crowley starts to tell him how this has bonded them, like in Band of Brothers, or Girls! Turns out, he only wants to be loved, really loved.  Sam is now staring at him, as are the rest of us. WHAT? And his voice has changed…

Dean & Cas: Dean is on the phone to Kevin to see how he’s getting on with the translation of the Angel Tablet.  While Kevin explains that not only is there no mention of the Neiphilim or the Cupid, and that sports analogies aren’t for everyone, Dean… Naomi appears. Cas just about remembers not to stab her on sight. So, she poked around Metatron’s head. No, he’s not completing the trials of the Angel Tablet. He’s trying to cast out all the angels from Heaven and down to earth. Now, that’s revenge! MetaMarv is also aware of something else – that Sam will die when he completes the Third Trial, that his sacrifice is part of it.  Funny, he never mentioned it. And finally, she has also realized that she has been mistaken. That her job was to protect God’s creation, and she lost sight of it. Hooray!  She’s redeemed!! Ok, I’m biased. I just don’t want my good name associated with the ultimate bitch of Supernatural. So, Dean tells Kevin to keep working and tells Cas to get him back to Sam.

Church (Sam & Crowley): Now, Crowley starts to speak politely to Sam, and call him by name. He asks him what he said in confession. No, it’s a trap, don’t tell him. But, he seems very different. “Where do I start to look for forgiveness?”, he asks. Really? Is the cure actually working? Sam doesn’t engage in the discussion, he’s too smart for that. He just tells him to start with the next injection, and Crowley offers his neck obediently.

So, now all the injections have been completed, Sam starts the exorcism.  Sam looks like a washed up junkie. The man could be knocked over by a strong wind at this point. As he cuts his hand to complete the cure, Dean walks in, and tells him to stop.  He breaks the news that if he completes the Trial, Sam will die. Sam’s reaction is, “So?”

Heaven: Cas, on the other hand, still convinced that Naomi was lying and Metatron is truthful, goes back to Heaven to sort it out. Only to have an Angel Blade held to his throat by Metatron. Naomi is in a pool of blood, from a hole in her head given to her with her own drill. As Marv drags a blade across Cas’ throat, he makes a small niche and removes his Grace, he explains that these were never the trials. This was a spell. You sly, nasty little… And to top it off, he doesn’t kill Cas, he sends him back to earth, as a mortal, and tells him to find a wife and have a family and then tell him his stories when his soul comes to Heaven after he dies. Does this mean he’s not all bad, maybe just slightly deluded? Ohhh, I don’t knowww…

Church (Sam, Dean & Crowley): There now follows possibly the most heartbreaking scene in the history of Supernatural. Crowley is almost cured, but Dean wants Sam to stop. With all the knowledge they now have, they can fight demons more effectively than ever before, but he can’t do it alone. Sam explains how he barely does it with him, how all he ever does is let him down, how that was his confession – Sobbing now, can’t type –

…how he has had to watch Dean replace him with an angel, and then a vampire. How the hell is Dean holding it together? Sam is crying his eyes out, and quite frankly, he’s in such bad shape, this could end him, and then Dean – Man, these people are trying to kill me – tells Sam how he matters more than anything, how he killed Benny for him, how he’d let Crowley and every other demon go to save him. So, how to stop? Sam’s arms are glowing white; the blood is dripping from his wound. Dean bandages him up, hugs him – see, big hugs = good – and tells him to let it go. And it works, for a second.

He ends up dragging Sam outside the church. “I’ve got you little brother, you’re going to be just fine” I’m floored again. Sam’s gasping for air. Dean’s roaring for Cas, who has now landed back on Earth, probably mortal, and Kevin’s leaving the MOL bunker. WHY?? Don’t know, but there’s all sorts of alarm bells starting to sound, and red lights, and the table in the war room lights up. Cas is running looking at the sky, and then Dean looks up to see the sky full of falling angels, like teardrops of fire, crashing to the ground.

What, it’s over? Really? REALLY!! You leave me with this amazing cliffhanger, after this amazing Season and I’m meant to be ok? I’m an emotional disaster.  What now? What about Sam? How’s he going to get better? Was Kevin just heading out on a beer run? What’s going to happen to Crowley? Who is he at this stage? What are the angels going to do on earth? Is anyone safe? Is Abaddon going to release Lucifer from the cage? Are the souls in Heaven going to notice yet another change in management, do they have a tenants committee? What comebacks will we see in Season 9? The door has been left pretty wide open on them. (May I quietly suggest GHOSTFACERS FOR SEASON 9 PLEASE!) It’s all too much. Flippin’ Hellatus… See you in the fall!

Written by: Naomi (@gizmolg13)

Supernatural Recap – 8×22 “Clip Show”

Clip Show

I think the producers on the show are messing with us. Nearly the end of the season, only one more episode to go, and they’re pulling out all the stops. We’re building up to major happenings next week, and it looks like major cliffhangers too. And these episodes are so good, the hell-atus is really going to hurt!

Opening scene: We’re going old style with the opening scene: a log cabin in the woods, cute couple inside. He’s looking nervously out the window, she’s saying how much she loves the place. Proper horror movie set-up, except it’s the guy freaking out. “Did you hear that?” “Oooh, maybe it’s a bear!” “NO, don’t go near the window…”

And then, we see why he’s freaking out. I knew he looked familiar! It’s Tommy Collins from Season 1, rescued from the hands/claws, (OK clutches) of the Wendigo by baby Sam and Dean. Ah, those were the days, when Sam had bangs (or a fringe as I’d say), and before Dean’s voice fully broke. They were so young! They say you never forget your first love, well, the Wendigo is that for me. He is the monster that seeded my now full-grown obsession with this show. I was kind of sad that we just saw a small clip of him. There’s poor Tommy, obviously suffering from Post-Traumatic-Monster-Tried-to-Eat-Me-Syndrome, in the woods for a romantic weekend with his girlfriend and a flame thrower. Then, it gets really freaky. With a whimpering , ‘What’s happening to me?’, poor Tommy turns in to this week’s Supernatural squelch. I wonder what the FX guys file that sound under? Head Exploding Effect, Major Blood Spurt Effect, Learn Not to Eat During the Opening Clip of an SPN Ep Effect…

The Boys’ Lair: Back home (they have a home, awwww!), Sam is hitting the case files looking for ways to cure a demon. Dean seems to have eased up a bit on the mothering, and is now sympathizing with him by feeding him warm beer and peanut butter cups. He’s also giving Cas the full on Dean Winchester, “You let me down” treatment. Sam’s been through it before, and he knows it will pass, but poor Castiel is giving his best puppy eyes and getting nowhere. Dean, Dean, Dean *sigh*, when will you learn not to take it all so personally? He’s upset that Cas didn’t trust him with the angel tablet. As for Cas, once again, he thought he was doing the right thing. His only mistake was getting caught-oh, and losing the tablet. Oh yeah, and almost getting killed in the process. Ok, so he made a lot of mistakes, and they’re the same ones he keeps making. For all the monster hunting and angel warfare he’s engaged in, he is still pretty naive. That’s why he needs Dean. C’mon you two, hug it out!

7B Bunker Time (still in the the boys’ lair): The case files lead the boys to a room 7B in the bunker. Seriously, how big is this place? Sam finds the file he’s looking for; the one referred to in the MOL notes as “Weird!!!”, and the envelope contains an old film reel. Time for family film night, Winchester Style. While they’re looking, Dean finds a secret entrance to a dungeon with a devil’s trap, and he’s pleased. After all, every hunter home should have one.

So, as the boys eat popcorn, they watch the movie of a terrified young priest, Fr. Simon, and his colleague, Fr. Max Thompson, performing a ‘new kind’ of exorcism, back in 1954. It’s classic B movie stuff, shaky hand held camera, black and white, sound of the reel whirring around, and is being filmed by Josie Sands, who we later came to know after she was possessed by  Abaddon. This exorcism involves incantations with different words, and then Fr. Max cuts his hand and places it over the demon’s mouth.  I’m guessing by their reaction that the vessel lying dead on the floor with her chest split open, and the demon released into the world, was not the result they were looking for initially. How’s the popcorn now, guys?  See, now you know how we feel!

On discovery that Fr. Simon is still alive, the boys set off to find him. He explains that Fr. Max was trying to cure the demon – cue gasps of amazement and disbelief! Seriously, that just fits in so neatly, but I’m happy to go with it. This is all the Winchester legacy/destiny thing after all, so things do have to fall into place sometimes. Fr. Max’s belief was that the demon was merely a twisted soul, once human, but ravaged over time. By cleansing the soul, you cure the demon. Simple!

Back to Cas: In the meantime, Castiel has gone on a supply run, and is proof that angels and mini-marts don’t mix. As he tries to make Dean love him again by buying him porn and beer, he crushes eggs, knocks over shelves, and terrorizes the shop assistant over their lack of pie. Metatron’s appearance, and insistence that he puts down the virgin, puts a stop to the shopping trip.

It’s the first time that Cas and Metatron meet. Sorry, Marv. He’s Marv in public. Marv just wants to meet up for coffee and crepes and talk about home. Catch up on what’s going on because he’s been out of the loop. OK, seems fine so far…

Turns out good ol’ Marv has been in heaven, crawling through celestial nooks and crannies, he says, to sneak a peek. As we all know, things aren’t good. Apparently, Naomi isn’t in charge, but is one of many factions still vying for control. Cas still feels responsible for the destruction of order in heaven, and he feels guilty for losing the tablet and for betraying his friends…and for letting everyone down. Oh, honey, it’ll be okay. If only he could make up for all his mistakes…hang on, Marv has a great idea! Call a ‘family meeting’ for everyone in heaven, get them all into a room together, and talk it out. Only thing is, they’ll have to be locked in there. You know, the gates of Heaven will have to be closed.  Mmmhmm, sure thing, Marv, you have everyone’s best interests at heart after all.

Bunker Time Again: We move to the boys going through the last of Fr. Max’s things. He audio taped all the exorcisms he performed, including the last one, done two days before something ripped him apart. I really love the MOL bunker, and with the boys sitting in the War Room, the panel of old data banks behind them, and us seeing grainy B&W footage of the exorcism. It’s just gorgeous. Sorry, total offshoot there, but love the flow of the 50’s vibe. Fr. Max was injecting the demon with his own blood, purified by having just been to confession, and then questioning him over and over, about how it felt to eat the children of the man he possessed. The answers start at ‘Orgasmic’, but eventually, after 8 hours he apologizes and wonders why he did it. The incantation doesn’t kill this one. Instead a pure light, like the one the angels give when they die, goes through him, and he is left a man. He CURED a demon!

OK, so Dean decides to road test this exorcism. Great idea. There’s no mention of where they’re going to get the blood though. I mean, it has to be Sam’s blood, right? He’s being cleansed by the trials, so it must be pure. Dean is many, many things, but pure? I doubt it. #PUREMAN for sure, though.

Cas and Marv: As for Cas and good ol’ MetaMarv; caramel crepes are go, and all seems good with the world. Marv is selling Cas his plan, how it’s going to help Heaven heal, and prevent unnecessary bloodshed on Earth. After all, he just wants to help. Obviously, he can’t do it all alone, he needs a warrior. He needs Castiel, and as luck would have it, he knows the tasks to be completed to close the gates of Heaven, no angel tablet required. He is just great, isn’t he? So knowledgeable, so concerned, so helpful. The fact that he’d be a hero in Heaven is just the icing on the cake, no hidden agenda here. So, they need to kill a Neiphilim, the offspring of a human and an angel. Oh, hello pretty waitress! What’s that, Marv, she’s one? Never. The only one in existence, you say? Imagine that. An abomination? A tad harsh, perhaps, but he’s entitled to his view. Cas has to kill her, rip her heart out. Now, Castiel, that inner voice you’re hearing telling you she is innocent and doesn’t deserve to die isn’t your conscience. No, it’s us, the viewers, screaming at the TV. Don’t do it! Don’t trust Marv!

Sam, Dean, and an Exorcism: So, if you had to test out a new exorcism spell, OBVIOUSLY, you’re going to jigsaw puzzle back together one of the strongest demons you’ve ever encountered, right? Like I said, classic horror movie stuff. How much of this episode did I spend shouting, “No! That is not a good idea!?” Well, basically, most of this scene. First, they sew Abaddon’s head back on, in some abandoned warehouse. Let’s keep in mind they now have a dungeon, with a massive Devil’s Trap and chains with sigils on them, to keep ‘demons on a leash’ as Dean said. But no, some massive old building in the middle of nowhere will suffice, and they won’t consecrate the ground until after they reanimate her. Really, it’s like they missed out the basics here. They do, however, think to chop off her hands. Interesting! It’s not every day that you hear someone threaten to stump people to death. Turns out Abaddon knows all about the curing ritual too, and is the one who killed Fr. Max back in ’58. So, just as they’re about to get going, Crowley calls Sam on his mobile. Yes, really, Crowley. Abaddon is disgusted the former salesman is now the King of Hell. Is this season all about vengeance for the civil servants of Heaven and Hell? Naomi bristled at being called a pencil pusher by Crowley, and MetaMarv says he used to be part of the typing pool. Hmm, don’t underestimate the admin staff, people. Just ask her:

Classic mistake, again. The boys decide they’d better take Crowley’s call in private, and they leave Abaddon alone. Most powerful demon they’ve ever encountered, and they leave her alone. Not only that, but they also leave her hands within arms’ reach (Ha-ha! See what I did there?) She takes the opportunity to summon her hands. Clearly, they’ve seen the Evil Dead II, and behave accordingly, crawling over to her, removing the Devil’s Trap bullet from the roof of her mouth, reattaching themselves, and BINGO!, she’s free. Maybe she should keep them as removable entities. They seem very handy! (Sorry). I mean, we could all use a helping hand once in a while (OK, I’ll stop now).

Cut to Crowley: Meanwhile, Crowley is being just downright mean. Turns out he’s the one responsible for poor Tommy Collins’ internal combustion, and he’s not finished yet. Time for Jenny Klein, the former witches’ secretary to be burned, literally. Having given them an address, the boys arrive to find her overdone in her own oven. Crowley calls again to inform them that he plans to kill everyone they’ve ever saved; one every 12 hours until the Demon Tablet is returned. Turns out the Supernatural books aren’t only going to be the Gospel of Sam and Dean; they are handy research for the King of Hell, too. With a hotel address in Indianapolis, and 57 minutes to go, Sam and Dean do their best racing across town, to find that the hotel room is occupied by Sarah Blake. Sarah, if you don’t remember her, was the first girl after Jessica to turn Sam’s head. However, they never got beyond kissing, and therefore, she seemed to escape the curse of sleeping with Sam Winchester and dying. Can’t help thinking there’s worse ways to go, but anyway…

Castiel and MetaMarv follow the waitress. As she turns and begs them for her life, Cas is clearly considering letting her live. Marv, however, is having none of it. So, she fights back, and she’s pretty good!  Just as she has Marv at the throat over his racist remarks, Cas slays her by putting an angel sword through her throat. Trial one done.  Oh, Cas, this is not going to go the way you want!

Countdown on, the boys demon-proof the room and are prepped to fight anything that comes looking for Sarah. With 16 minutes to go, she and Sam play catch up. She’s a Mom now and engaged. Sam says he’s happy for her (awww), but nothing’s really changed for him. Sarah doesn’t agree. She thinks he seems more focused and confident. Just as she tells him his old hair was better, (duh), Sam’s phone rings with Crowley counting down from 10 to 1. Poor Sarah hits the floor, suffocating. Sam and Dean run around the room, trying to find a hex bag, as Crowley verbally rips them apart. Man, he is mean, really hitting where it hurts. He is trying to pull apart everything they’ve done, so that they’ll submit and give him the Demon Tablets. He’s not letting any more demons near them, but will go on killing innocents until he gets his way. Not only that, but the evil son of a witch has hiding the hex bag in Sam’s phone, which they only find after Dean hurls it at the wall in frustration after Sarah dies.

Poor Sam, he’s distraught. Crowley won’t let any demons near them, and they can’t complete the Third Trial without one. Dean won’t have it, though.  “We’ll kick it in the ass, like we always do.” Yep! I believe it, but does Sam?

The Season Finale is next week and the ducks are in a row for one hell of an ending. I cannot wait…but then it will be over for MONTHS, so maybe I can wait a little.

 

Written by: Naomi (@gizmolg13)

Supernatural Recap – 8×21 “The Great Escapist”

The Great Escapist

First things first, this episode ROCKED! It was just brilliant moment followed by brilliant moment. Let’s break this episode down by location!

Garth’s Boat: Kevin’s back! He’s on the boat, and Sam & Dean arrive with the other half of the demon tablet. Now, there’s a few alarm bells ringing. For one thing, Sam has suddenly learned to raise his eyebrows really high while smiling. I mean, I’ve seen him do the Sam sad face, raise them in the middle loads of times, but this is disconcerting. And he’s, like, really really smiley. Also, they got the tablet by laying ‘an awesome trap’.  Ahem, what the actual… where, when, why haven’t we seen this? I’m sending someone a strongly worded letter, or tweet. Kevin gets to work, while Sam calls him Special K, and basically sounds like someone’s uncle trying to be ‘down with the kids’. At this point, I am actually jumping up & down, shouting “It’s not them, it’s not them!”, and then they walk through a portal, and become demons in denim! Hooray! Oh, I mean, boo, bad demons! Leave Kevin alone!  So, turns out Crowley has decided to turn Kevin’s life into the Truman Show, and he’s the director.  He gives the demons some acting tips, and sends them on their way.

MOL Bunker: The real deal.  Sam looks like crap, so it’s definitely him. Dean is offering to feed him stew on a spoon, whole airplane deal, but he refuses, damn. Sam actually tells Dean how he feels now. I know, picked myself up off the floor too. He’s not lying when he says the trials are changing him from the inside. They receive a video email from Kevin, he’s probably dead or captured, and pretty upset. How awful am I? Kevin is upset about dying, and crying, and all I can think is how hot Dean looks when he’s teary eyed. Kevin has sent them all the work he’s done so far for them to go through, so Sam gets to work. We’ll make this quick. Sam recognizes a symbol on Kevin’s notes from his Humanities studies in Stanford…well, he is an MOL legacy. After trying to acquaint Dean with political correctness, they head off to Colorado to track down the Native American tribe who used it.

Biggerson’s: Cas is in Santa Fe, and in Biggerson’s!! Got to love this joint.  This chain has been through a lot with these guys! After the waitress is treated to a Cas chat about coffee, “I remember when you first discovered it”, a shockwave in his cup sends him packing just before two more angels arrive.  Judging by Naomi’s reaction to their report, this has been going on for a while. Turns out, Cas is using the Biggerson’s chain as a sort of portal, constantly switching from one to the next, and they can’t catch him. Of course, she says they’ll just have to stop him. You know this isn’t going to be good, don’t you?

Cas zaps back to Santa Fe again, only to find it all bloody, and his waitress left eyeless and repeating “You have to stop” over and over. Naomi strikes again. She shows up with her henchmen and tells Cas a thing or three. Mainly that he’s been disobedient. Team Free Will rides again, I think! And then he quotes Dean! Anyway, as she’s trying to persuade the angel tablet out of him, Crowley shows up & shoots her henchmen. She is not impressed, but runs before he can shoot her, or discover that one of her angels is working for Crowley.

Two Rivers Hotel, Colorado: Sam is acting very weird as Dean tries to check into the hotel, and this leads to the BEST EYE ROLL EVER from Dean!

They eventually get to their room, where Sam reminisces about Dean riding a Farty Donkey through the Grand Canyon. Delirious Sam makes me want to see more drunk Sam, he’s fun! And Dean just gets more and more serious the sillier Sam gets. So, he heads off to do research while Sam sleeps. Of course, Sam doesn’t sleep for long, and ends up wandering in the corridor and discovering boxes of books being left at a door, while Dean’s research uncovers that this tribe’s God demanded stories as their sacrifices.

Naturally, being them, they end up entering the room, which is full of towers of books, and meet Metatron. He is an angel, but has been in hiding so long, that he hasn’t even heard of THEM, much to Sam’s disgust. “We’re the frigging Winchesters!”. Guess he didn’t get to the Supernatural books yet. So, they inform him of all the deaths of the Archangels, who he’s been hiding from, and then verbally rip him a new one for running away all this time. I bet he’s so glad they found him…

Garth’s boat: Kevin is a genius after all, and has figured out that he’s not where he should be.  Maybe Crowley should have played Dean after all. Turns out his demons were too darn polite, which led to them going on a food run that ended in a Devil’s Trap.

Crowley’s Office: Turns out Crowley figured out that Cas has become a tablet mule, and has concealed the Angel Tablet inside him. So he rips through the bullet hole he put in him earlier and reaches in and takes it. Simple! Cas turns into badass-Cas after Crowley has left and kills the double agent angel with the bullet taken from his own gut! Rambo Angel!

Two Rivers Hotel: Metatron transports Kevin to his room. He wakes up with the other half of the Demon Tablet in his hand, and proudly announces that he has figured out the Third Trial, only for Metatron to say, “Yeah, you have to cure a demon.” Now, if I had had my whole life taken away from me, my Mother driven into hiding, my girlfriend killed, nearly lost my sanity & been tortured by the King of Hell, I think I’d be pretty pissed off if someone just stepped in and stole my thunder at the end of it all. Maybe Kevin will go badass on Metatron next week?

So, as the boys drive off into the night, like they always do, they spot a figure lying in the middle of the road. It’s Cas, doing his best Dean quoting again. It’s all setting up for a big finale.

Written by Naomi (@gizmolg13)

Supernatural Recap – 8×17 “Goodbye Stranger”

Goodbye Stranger

Let’s talk about the opening scene of this episode real quick. We see Cas killing Dean, without remorse. Naomi walks in and tells him good job for being a brutal killer. Camera pans out. BAM! There are hundreds of dead Dean’s scattered on the floor. This is bad. Real bad. I HATE YOU NAOMI!

Sam is hiding the fact that he’s coughing up blood from Dean. What’s new? When is he NOT hiding something from Dean? While Dean looks at some old-school classy Asian porn, Sam does research and connects some deaths across the Midwest. Off they go to investigate. They visit a dude who’s wife just died and shows them her little creation in the basement. Apparently, his wife, Annie, went straight bonkers and built a town replica in their basement and hung up bags of dirt she dug up from a play ground over said town replica. He said her eyes even turned black. BLAMMO! Demon. This guy says he went out to the bar after this happened and when he returned home, she was dead. He went to the bar for a drink? If my f*cking spouse’s eyes turned black, I don’t think I’d be going out for a cocktail OR be coming home after I did. I’d be packing my bags and leaving the country ASAP. Dean and Sam go to some lady’s house to question her and a pack of demons show up looking for information. Things aren’t looking to good until Cas shows up. YAY! Castiel is back! Not so fast. He’s being judo mind-controlled by Naomi from Heaven. That bitch!

Side note: I feel really bad for the lady that died in her rollers. That would not be the way I’d want to go out. They could have at least taken those rollers out for her so she didn’t look like that for her last moments on Earth. Geez.

Goodbye Stranger Supernatural Meg

Dean, Sam and Cas find out that a demon is being held captive in town and when they go to investigate, we see that it’s Meg. She’s had the shit beaten out of her and all Dean can say is, “What’s with the hair?” Really, Dean? Meg knows the location of the crypts that hold the angel tablet and has been lying to the demons about where they are to buy some time. They ask Meg for her help in locating it, and she agrees. Megstiel (dubbed by Dean himself) get their flirt on while Dean and Sam look for the location of the crypt on Google Maps. May I just say that I would have loved to see Cas and Meg get their supernatural freak on!

When they go to uncover the angel tablet, Meg and Sam hang back spray painting traps on walls while Dean and Cas hunt down the tablet. Meg gets into Sam’s head by asking him what’s going on and gets him to spill his beans about Amelia. Damn. She’s good. Meanwhile, Cas and Dean find the tablet and crazy Cas is like, “Yeah, go ahead and give that to me. I’ll take it straight to Heaven.” Dean, realizing that he’s off his f*cking rocker, won’t give the tablet to him. Naomi is in Cas’s head, telling him to kill Dean. With her in his head, he starts beating the shit out of Dean. NO! PLEASE! NOT HIS FACE.

It becomes obvious to Dean that Cas is being controlled and he tells him to stop and that he knows this isn’t him! “We’re family.” *cue the waterworks* AH! Back on the other side of the building, Meg and Sam take out some of Crowley’s demons that have come for the tablet. Crowley, you son of a bitch. Just when we think Cas is going to kill Dean, he drops his blade, takes the angel tablet and heals his face. Thank you! Cas tells him that he has to protect the tablet from Naomi AND him, then *boop* he’s gone. #deuces. #adiosbitches.

SO, Sam and Dean drive off without even trying to save Meg. I find this pretty shitty seeing how she just helped them out and saved their lives! What the hell? We see Crowley and Naomi meet up. Da fucque is going on here? Naomi says that Cas is doing what he should be doing, protecting the tablet. In true Crowley fashion, he tries to strike a deal with her. What’s the deal? TELL ME! Sam and Dean drive off into the sunset, with Dean giving Sam a big bro talk about being honest. Let’s see how long the whole honesty thing lasts. I’m going to guess one episode. Oh, and Cas is on a greyhound going only God know where (pun intended) with that damn tablet.

Next week, Sam and Dean travel to Professor Xavier’s School for gifted youngsters, the headmaster calls Bobby a “barely functioning alcoholic” and they have to watch their back for skeevy 15-year-old hunters in training. Leave your thoughts and comments! Until next time….

xoxo,

TeamTSD

 

Goodbye Stranger

Oh, and RIP MEG (we think). She was a hoot in this episode. Let’s revisit some of her hilarious one-liners in her honor.:

“Aren’t you a little short for a Storm Trooper?”

“Do I look like Google to you?”

“We survive this, I’m going to order some pizza and we’re gonna move some furniture around. You understand?”

“You fell in love with a unicorn. It was beautiful. Then sad, then sadder. I laughed, I cried, I puked in my mouth a little.”

SUPERNATURAL RECAP: 8×16 ‘REMEMBER THE TITANS’

Remember the TitansLast week’s episode was every nerd’s dream. I have been fantasizing about being a Greek Goddess/marrying a Greek God since I was 12. Don’t act like you weren’t, either. Being draped in ivory silk and bathing in rose petals and 2% milk never sounded appealing? #GetReal. Anyways…Dean and Sam were in the batcave investigating a case about some joker who was found frozen and dead in the road from being hit by a car with a bird eating his guts, and all of a sudden he disappeared in, like, two seconds. The cop that witnessed this insisted that it was a zombie, but Sam and Dean being the PRO-FESSIONALS that they are were like, “Um, yeah, you crazy. Everybody knows zombies aren’t real.” Really, Winchesters? Tell that to Sheriff Rick:

#disgusting

Anyways, Dean and Sam (well, Sam really), discovers that this crazy mofo is…A GREEK GOD! They witnessed him coming back from life themselves while in a morgue where his temporary corpse was laying, and then brought him back to their hotel room to figure out what da fucque was wrong with him. After Sam figures out that he is Prometheus, the boys dive into how they can save him from dying.every.single.day. For those of you that aren’t familiar, the Greek myth of Prometheus is that he stole fire from the Gods after Zeus took it from the humans. (Really, Zeus? What a dick.) After Zeus caught Prometheus doing this, he cursed him with dying EVERY day for all eternity. Oh, and it doesn’t stop there. He dies a different way every time: heart attack, hit by a bus, choke on a potato chip, you name it. I’ll give Zeus one thing, the man sure is creative and doesn’t run out of ideas. When you live for eternity you have to entertain yourself somehow, right? Don’t want to end up like this bitch:

#OhKay

So if you think that’s the worst part, just wait. It gets worse. Apparently, Prometheus let his hormones get the best of him, and he conceived a child with some chick at the bottom of a mountain like six years prior. This kid has the same curse, too. #GREAT. So not only do Sam and Dean have to save a frackin’ Greek God, they have to save his bastard son. #LifeOfAHunter. The boys summon Zeus to talk negotiations, and it doesn’t go as well as planned. Zeus shows up, and his aura just screams asshole. They trapped him in some kind of spell (similar to the ones they use for demons), and Zeus was not happy. He got all sassy and wouldn’t negotiate with them at all. I love how Dean had like no fear from any of Zeus’s threats. God of gods, Zeus, shows up in a Hugo Boss (pun intended) tailored suit with lightning coming from his fingertips Heroes-style:

and Dean’s like, “Yeah, whatever. You’re fingertips don’t intimidate me. I’m outta here.” Dean is such a badass. Pretty sure I’d be shitting my pants if Zeus was real, let alone five feet from me. Prometheus on the other hand…he looked more like a Patagonia model than a God, but that’s just me. Anyways, Prometheus’s baby mama fell for Zeus’s thousands-of-year-old tricks, and broke the trap. THEN (if things could possibly get any worse), Artemis shows up. For those of you who slept your way through Greek Mythology in your freshman courses, she’s the fierce bitch who is the Goddess of Hunters. She has been slacking lately, though, and has basically been her dad, Zeus’s, bitch since forever. *Side note*: her true love is also Prometheus. Sam and Dean get to her weak spot (Prometheus and his eternal suffering), and get her to stand up to Zeus and save Prometheus and his baby mama and son. Prometheus ends up getting put in the line of fire, and dies from her mythical/magic arrow. #GreekTragedy #TrueToForm. Shit was sad, but the son was saved, so all is well.

“Yay!” (Ok, so I just wanted a reason to use this .gif, *sigh*)

I love episodes like this. Supernatural truly steps outside the box when it comes to creating and giving us something fresh and original to look forward to on Wednesday nights (or whatever night it is for our international lovelies). This hiatus blows, but I can’t wait for the return. Give us Cas! And even Crowley for crying out loud! Until next time…

xoxo,

TeamTSD

SUPERNATURAL RECAP – 8×15 ‘MAN’S BEST FRIEND WITH BENEFITS’

Stink bombin' and savin' the world. #nobigs

Stink bombin’ and savin’ the world. #nobigs

Well if that episode title isn’t witty as hell, I don’ t know what is. Last night was packed with tons of awkward moments, most of them including Dean blushing over a witch getting it on with his “pet”, who just so happen to transform back and forth between a human and dog. Yeah. We were lost, too. Let’s dive into the dirty deets before we confuse you further:

Portia is a familiar, a witch that goes back and forth from human to animal. She belongs to an old friend of Sam and Dean’s named James, who has been dabbling into witchcraft and he seems to of gotten himself into trouble. This guy just isn’t any old witch, though. This chica named Portia is his, “familiar”, and she’s half dog/half human and wears this really tacky pink collar the whole time. Apparently familiar’s are drawn to a certain master or some shit, but they had a more intimate relationship than the average supernatural couple. Whatever, it was weird.

“So…you’re also a…human? Right…”

Anyways, James was having some crazy ass dreams about killing people, and he was starting to go a little batshit. Familiars and masters can communicate telepathically, and Portia could sense that something was up. James blocked her from his mind because he didn’t want her to see how was, well you know, KILLING PEOPLE. Portia freaks out and enlists the help of Dean and Sam.

The boys look into a “killing” spell from Bobby’s research (RIP) to see if maybe their friend James is being forced to do the killing. Dean decides to investigate further and visits this bar that looks like an escort service, but it’s filled with familiar/witch couples. The best was this gay little Wicken who turned into a cat and then hit on Dean. It was hilarious. And that bar was pure fucking class. Versailles style furniture, pianos, and cocktails with fruit. It looked just like the TeamTSD headquarters. #truth. Lone and behold, one of the witch’s was jealous of James because he wanted his familiar. That sounded weird…anyways…this asshole wanted Portia and was going to either frame James for her, or kill him for her. There was a big witch battle and Sam and Dean used a potion to kill the bad guy, and everyone lived happily ever after. #duh.

Now let’s dive into our Winchester hotties a little deeper. I have some shit I want to sort through:

deanDean: Dean needs to get laid. He is too damn fine to get all hot and bothered over the mention of the word, “sex”. His tension may be more from Sam and the three trials, though. He was pretty tore up all episode. He had a big talk with Sam in the car about how he’ll be there for him, and if Sam isn’t ready for this he will be there to take the trials. I mean Dean has already been to Hell and back, like literally. He knows how terrible it is down there, and he doesn’t want to think of his brother suffering the same fate. Once again, Dean is pure f*cking class, and he is such a family man. I mean honestly, what more could a girl want? Guys want to be him, girls want to marry him, and he just got signed for a ninth season. #micdropbitches

samSam: Sam thinks that Dean doesn’t trust anyone but himself, but I think don’t think that’s case. Dean is just used to playing the care taker, and he can’t stand to see Sam in the line of fire. Remember when Dean sold his soul to bring Sam back from the dead? #shitslegit. Sam is going down a long and lonely road though…did you see that nose bleed at the end of the episode? It looks like the trials are starting to take a toll on him. Either that or he started doing coke. I’ll take the latter, though.

What do you guys think? Are things getting a little crazy or what? And where is Cas? I need my favorite angel back! Leave your thoughts. Until next time…

xoxo,

TeamTSD

SUPERNATURAL RECAP 8×14 – “TRIAL AND ERROR”

Just off to save the world (again) in that muscle car. #NeverGetsOld

Just off to save the world (again) in that boss muscle car. #NeverGetsOld

Well guys, it got real in this episode. Not only were there hell hounds, there was a horny horse tamer and a family more bat shit crazy than the Kardashians. Sam and Deal still saved the day, of course. Now lets get down to the dirty deets:

"Live a normal life? HA. I just choked on my roadside burrito. That's hilarious."

“Live a normal life? HA. I just choked on my roadside burrito. That’s hilarious.”

Sam: Is he the little brother or big brother? Sam really stepped up to the plate, and he has been doing so consistently for the last couple episodes. All Dean wants for Sam is for him to live a normal, fulfilling life. What Dean refuses to accept, though, is that Sam can’t live a normal life. I mean the guy’s a damn HUNTER OF SUPERNATURAL DEMONS. How can someone find peace with themselves after that? How can you have kids without wondering whether some crazy black smoke is going to blow up their asses and possess them till next Tuesday? You don’t know, and you never will. #realtalk. Sam has accepted this and is going balls deep into whatever it takes to save the world. Think about how far Sam has come. In the first couple seasons he was still aimed at wanting a “normal” life. Sam has grown up to accept the path his life has taken, and he won’t let Dean babysit him anymore. #YouDoYou #SaveTheWorldAndStuff

Dean holding handcuffs? Um...#yesplease

Dean holding handcuffs? Um…#yesplease

Dean: Don’t let the Sam recap discourage you. Dean Winchester is the epitome of #pureman. You define what Greek Gods are made of, and you have the jawline of an Egyptian bust. I could sing your praises till I was blue in the face, and then keep subconsciously talking about you. Everyone gets how you want to be the martyr and conquer the three realms of hell yourself, but no man journeys alone when they have a hot brother who’s willing to help. You can’t go into a fight against the King of Hell guns/demon daggers-a-blazing all rogue. Did Braveheart’s William Wallace go into battle alone? No. He took his brothers with him, and they fought together. You’d think he would know this considering he role-played that exact character two weeks ago. Let’s just toss that gif in there again:

See how badass that is? I bet Crowley would shit his pants if he saw that.  #JustSaying. Don’t worry, Dean, you and Sam won’t succumb to the depths of Hell. Unless, of course, season 9 is set there. #HOLLA! #SPNSEASON9 #NotThatItsASurprise #FanGirlHashtagFreakOut

Puts a WHOLE new meaning to dysfunctional family.

Puts a WHOLE new meaning to dysfunctional family.

The Cassidy Clan: These guys are just a big ball of white trash millionaires. Like I’m talking snowball effect of crazy assholes. They have a Hugh Hefner wannabe for a dad, a washed up teen queen pop star with an excessive drinking problem, a brainwashed real-housewife, and a slutty sister who studies abroad. The Winchesters thought that they all had sold their souls at the crossroads at one point, and so they locked them all in a room to see who would geek out first. (Remember, if you are being chased by Hell Hounds, you start to hallucinate and go cray-cray). Think the boys got their hands full? Just wait. Guess who the Crazy Cassidy’s sold their soul to? CROWLEY. #notkidding. It’s like they can’t escape that mother. Any-who, the hot ranch-hand, Ellie, was also included in this hot mess. She sold her soul to Crowley so her mom could play golf in Arizona. Really? That’s it? You couldn’t have thrown a pair of Tiffany studs in there? Whatever. Dean, of course, saves her in her too-tight tank-top and distressed jeans. She left to go run and hide, and the family was set free. Oh yeah, one of the daughter’s got mauled by a Hell Hound. She slept with the her sister’s husband though so that shits just #karma.

Needs a shower and a kleenex. #stat

Needs a shower and a kleenex. #stat

Kevin: Boy was a HOT.MESS. in this episode. He hadn’t showered for a month and was on the verge of having a massive addiction to pain killers. You’d think the word of God would be a little less perilous and a little more righteous. #justsaying. Sam and Dean swoop in and have an intervention Supernatural-style and make Kevin take a shower and a nap. After a little R&R Kevin calls the boys to tell them he found the way to send all the demons back to Hell for good: the three trials. Sound familiar? Buffy fans will remember a similar path that spike took to get his soul back. #legitshit. Anyways, Dean of course is like, “All me bro. Go live your life and be normal.” We all know how that turned out.

 

I love episodes that are about the season’s main story-arc. So much shit happens you have to watch it twice. Which means you get to re-watch this:

Clark Kent ain’t got nothing on this.

What do you guys think will happen with the rest of the trials? I honestly don’t care, as long as the boys take their shirts off next. Until next time…

xoxo,

TeamTSD

See next week’s trailer here.