In the words of Dean Winchester, that was AWESOME!
Look at that brooding, and those lips, and that popped collar, and…sorry-back to the recap. So last night returned with an action-packed episode. We saw Crowley, the King of Hell, torturing poor angel Alphie, Kevin un-showered for what looked like a month, Cas unearthing some nightmare-ish memories, and Sam getting laid. Now, lets get down the dirty deets:
Dean. Seriously, you are totally underrated. Well, not really, because girls (and boys) have been swooning over you since 2005, but you get my drift. You drove all the way to Texas to get bitched at by your brother (the gas alone to get there in your ’67 Chevy Impala gas guzzler probably broke the bank, too), your angel wing-man is mysteriously disappearing and killing his own kind, and you had to break off your bromance with your vampire bestie, Benny. Listen, guys, before you all get all emotional and judgy about Dean cutting ties with Benny, put shit in perspective. Dean doesn’t have the time to save the angels of Heaven and also be someone’s AA sponsor. #OH,KAY. I didn’t even judge Dean when his Asian Sensation porn site popped up on the laptop, because he deserves a break. But Dean, next time you feel the need to visit that trash, call me. Like really. DM @TeamTSD on Twitter and we’ll make it happen. #notkidding #sorryDaneel ANYWAYS, Dean totally stepped up to the plate in this episode. He didn’t pressure Sam to follow the family business, and he made an executive decision to stay and investigate Cas’s situation. Do we even need to say it? Yes, yes we do. #PUREMAN
Sam. This is the first episode in a long time where I wasn’t totally pissed at you. I love you, Sammy, but it really makes me mad when you get in these moods where you want to be a normal person. You are like an angel, a deliverance from God, especially your abs. Yes, it sucks that you can’t live a normal life. It sucks you can’t rock it out with Amelia and have cute babies and coach a t-ball team. But that’s the price you have to pay to fight demons and SAVE THE WORLD. At least God gave you good hair and a hot brother. #perspective. ANYWAYS, Sam put his emotions aside and teamed up with Dean and Cas to save poor Alphie from being tortured to death by Crowley. However, that rescue didn’t have a happy ending because…
…Cas. WTF?! I know it’s not your fault, but you totally murdered your friend (poor Alphie!). What is up with that crazy bitch in Heaven messing with your head? That dumb hooker made you kill Alphie, all because he unwillingly gave up some angel secrets. PS-that memory flashback of that Heaven chick giving Cas a medical procedure gave me the heebie geebies. Cas is totally unaware that someone in Heaven has complete and total control over all of the angels, and can make them their bitches and do whatever they want. Apparently there is also an “angel” tablet (thanks to Alphie’s reveal while being tortured), and when put in the wrong hands (of let’s say…THE KING OF HELL) it can close off angels from leaving Heaven and never coming back to Earth to fight demons. If that doesn’t spell apocalypse, I don’t know what does. Cas is one lucky mofo to have the Winchester’s on his side, and I’m glad the boys have reconciled and are working on finding out who’s behind this craziness.
Amelia. I don’t blame a woman for giving an ultimatum. You laid shit out with Sam, but you have to realize there are bigger issues at hand than your orgasm. #YesIJustWentThere. Seriously, though, she walked into that hotel room with one agenda…and we saw how that turned out. She had her hooker pants on, and with a body like Sam’s I would have done the same thing. #sorrynotsorry. But, unfortunately for Amelia and her vagina, family comes first. She should know, that’s why she went back to her husband in the first place. #awsnap
Kevin. You look like shit. I understand you are studying the word of God, but I’m pretty sure God would understand if you took five minutes to take a shower. The Man did create personal hygiene for a reason.
Crowley. OMG you are such an asshole! I guess it comes with the package of being the king of Hell and all. Crowley now knows about the angel tablet that can prevent angels from ever leaving Heaven again, and that’s not a good thing. #awesome
Benny. It looks like you are running low on blood…and friends. Sorry about Dean cutting ties, but you need to do you for a while. Maybe Dean will ask Benny to join Team Save The World, and they can all be a really hot Scooby Gang? No? Not feeling it? Worth a shot.
Umm so next week’s preview? Dean dressed as Lancelot? Did all my sexual fantasies just come true? Possibly. Let’s just say I’m going to replay that preview over and over and over again until January 23rd. Who’s pumped?! Leave your thoughts below. #fangsout