Over the past 4 seasons, I’ve gone back and forth between rooting for Elena to be with Stefan and rooting for her to be with Damon. It’s caused some serious mental anxiety and a lot of sleepless nights. The truth is, both Damon and Stefan deserve happiness and love. But who is the best choice for Elena and what relationship is really built to last? Let’s dig way deeper than necessary into the Delena v Stelena debate. Here we go.


Damon: Let’s all just admit that we thought he was a raging asshole in the first season. He snapped Jeremy’s neck not knowing he had his ring on, he tried to kill Caroline after using her and turning her brain to jelly, he tried to kill Bonnie, he tried to let all the tomb vampires out, he threatened to kill Elena in the beginning, he killed Lexi for his own selfish reasons, he ate a shit ton of people from Mystic Falls (like Vicki) in Season 1 and he’s lied about a million times. Can we really forgive all of that? It’s easy to forget how much of a monster he used to be, but he truly was horrible. What we have to keep in mind is everything Damon has been through in his life. He didn’t ask to be a vampire. He wanted to die so of course he was such a jerk to Stefan. Plus, he didn’t have a friend like Lexi to show him the way like Stefan did. In fact, he didn’t have anyone that loved him at all. He found out Katherine never really cared about him, so I’m sure that was a complete mind f*ck. He was alone and he was broken. Can we really blame him for his actions?

Then, something happened. He fell for a girl who changed him and showed him that he didn’t have to live the life he was living. She gave him something to live for and a reason to be a better man. Elena is a truly good person at heart and she granted him way too many second chances. I’m glad she did though, because it gave way to a great friendship and now a beautiful love story. Their relationship is all about the journey. Because they have been through so much and were friends first, their relationship has an element of trust and honesty that we never saw with Stefan and Elena. They are 100% themselves with one another. Their love is passionate and consuming, but I guess that’s what happens after 3 seasons of sexual tension. Plus, if you had Damon staring at you like this all the time,


what the hell would you do? He’s dangerous, he’s dark, he’s mysterious and he’s hot as hell. No girl could resist. Sire bond aside, these two have a very deep love for each other and they deserve to give it a shot. Speaking of that damn sire bond, Damon is behaving like a true gentleman despite how much it sucks for him. He doesn’t want a one-sided love. He wants it to be real and that’s a real man. The fact that he wants to “do right by her” is a huge statement of how far he has come since Season 1.

To all those people out there ragging on Elena, she has been through so much and she deserves to do what makes her happy for once. If that means exploring her feeling for Damon, then so be it. Would you rather her be with Stefan and be thinking about Damon? Didn’t think so.


Stefan: These two have some serious history. Their love is pure and it’s true. Sure, Stefan went full-blown Ripper and tried to kill her, but he wasn’t himself. That’s not who he is and he NEVER hurt her or the people she loves when his humanity switch was flipped on. Stefan is, and always has been, a great man. He’s treated Elena well, and even when she told him that she had feeling for Damon in Season 4, he let her go. Her happiness matters to him above all else. That’s real love. You know what else I love about Stefan? He has been searching for the cure at the cost of her hating him. He wants to do what’s right for her no matter what the consequences are. Want to know what else I love about him? This:


Sweet Jesus! Look at that shit! Is this the background of my computer? Maybe.

Here’s my beef with their relationship. He’s looking for the cure at the expense of Jeremy’s life/sanity. He turned him into a psychotic hunter and he still wants to continue on his quest for the cure. This goes against everything he has stood for in the past. Stefan should be protecting the people Elena loves. Sacrificing Jeremy for Elena to become human again is selfish and he shouldn’t have been surprised when it only pushed her further away from him. I can’t help but feel that his reason for wanting Elena to become a human again is for his happiness, not hers. Let me make one more point. Would Stefan have stayed in Mystic Falls and shown interest in her if she wasn’t Katherine’s doppelgänger? Would he have saved her from the drowning car if it wasn’t for her doppel-face and his curiosity? No doubt he loved her once he got to know her, but his return to Mystic Fall was all out of curiosity. Just a thought.

Could Elena and Stefan’s relationship really last forever? Well, we know that Stefan would go to the ends of the earth for her, but he’s constantly teetering on the edge of Ripper-dom. He’s always just one slip-up away from becoming his evil, sans-humanity alter ego. I’m waiting for Elena’s new relationship with Damon to send him plummeting over the edge and into a mass-murder frenzy. Can we really blame him though? Not really. How the hell would you react if you found out the girl you broke up with a mere week ago bopped around with your brother? I can tell you I wouldn’t take it as well as he has. Heads would roll.

So… basically I have no real answer for you. Here’s what I do know though. Damon and Stefan’s relationship matters above everything else. These two are brothers and blood is thicker than water. Bro’s before hoes people (no offense Elena)! They’ve come so far and been through way too much to just write off their relationship because of a girl. Yeah she’s a special girl, but she still has a lot of life to live. She’s 18 for crying out loud! What’s to say she won’t decide to compel Brad Pitt to leave Angie and live with him forever in a castle in Paris? You just never know. So, come on boys! They need to chuck up the deuces to Elena and go on a brother bonding trip to Vegas or something because the most epic love story on The Vampire Diaries is Damon and Stefan’s.

Who do you think is the best choice for Elena? Could she even be with anyone for all of vampire eternity? Share your thoughts and remember: NO SHIP WARS. At the end of the day the only team that matter is TeamTVD. #FangsOut




  1. fatchicktofitchick

    I think she should be with Damon. My reason is that I truly believe that the love her and Stefan had was the equivalent of a major high school relationship. I think their love, at least at this point in the story, is rooted in people who they were. They have both changed and evolved so much prior to season 1. I don’t feel like they have been epic and truly in love since Season 2. Elena was going to grow up and change. Stefan’s ripper side would eventually come out and she would have to know all sides of him. Damon and Elena have been building something over 4 seasons, where I feel Stefan and Elena have been crumbling slowly over the last 2 seasons. I think Stefan is selfish with her in a way Damon is not. Just like Elena has learned to love the good and bad of Damon, he loves her any way she is. I think Stefan wants her to be who she was Season 1-Season 2. She has changed and even if she were to be human again, she would not feel the same about him. I think she chose him at the end of Season 3 because she is a lot like Damon. She was trying to do right by Stefan since she was with him first, and do right by Damon by not causing a rift with him and his brother on the off chance that she could really fall for him.

    1. teamtsd Post author

      Very well said and all valid points. I don’t know if her relationship with Stefan is over forever, but I think for now it’s important that she explores her feelings for Damon. She’s growing up and her feelings will change again. If she remains a vampire, you can’t tell me her feelings won’t change and evolve over the years/decades/centuries. But right now, she owes it to the boys (and herself) to figure out who her heart belongs to.

      1. fatchicktofitchick

        I would be surprised if she and Stefan were over forever, but I would like her to pick a brother and commit for now. If that does not work out, then to let them both go. I think if she keeps going back and forth between them, it could really get messy and quite frankly gross. I want both brothers to be happy, and if one of them gets Elena, then the other needs to move on try to find love with someone else. Hopefully they find it to be a more epic love than what they had it with Elena.

  2. yara

    amazing:) in the end what really matters is the family. Nice one. I go for delena…but i will understand if Damon sacrifices his love for the litle brother. And that will be epic too 🙂

  3. yara

    because we all see that the real unselfish person is Damon. And he always does anything for his brother (s04e08 and 9) well thats not fair…and i was pretty upset with stefan when he asked Damon to call the sire bound to tell elena to forget about him…


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